i'm not a human right now. not even a dancer.
i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
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