Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
Just saw a squirrel crossing the road in a crosswalk..my morning has improved exponentially.
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
my mind is a poorly written porno when i'm drunk.
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
Randomize
