Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
Just puked in a mcdonalds cup while driving. Didn't even swerve.
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
This is my gift to your gina
what better way to celebrate the birth of jesus christ than to get embarrassingly intoxicated and make poor decisions!?
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
I need a beard to bite.
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
Randomize
