Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
They only remember me when they're drunk...I'm like a suppressed memory.
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I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
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And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
You know that you're in a bad spot when the doctor puts you on 500mg of amoxicillin 4 times a day for ten days and puts refills on it...
Oh, btw, UPS might come by. Drunk me ordered us $75 worth of gummy airhead starburst type candies. Whatever it is, it'll be delicious.
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
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