There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
I lost my vibrator temporarily and for some unknown reason my first thought was that you might have stolen it. But then I realized you would never do that because you know it keeps me from killing people. But I am overtired and lacking in faith.
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"