Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
I feel like my life has just been one 21 year long episode of "i shouldn't be alive"
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
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