I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
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