It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
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he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
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the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
He shit in the fireplace
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
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