He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
Woke up at 4:30am to my little brother shaking me. Apparently I fell asleep naked on my kitchen table waiting for the toaster to pop. 2 years of college completed and i still havent learned my drinking limit...
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
Just saw a dude dressed as captain america driving down the highway. He saluted me.
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
I can't adult today.
Take a nap and try again
I have to buy a couch. There's nothing more adult than buying a couch on a Tuesday.
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
Randomize