I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
just accidentally masturbated with tiger balm. best. accident. ever.
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
Dammit. I drunkenly drank all my milk at 6 AM in a misguided stupor to prevent my roommates from stealing my milk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He started telling people I was Stephen Hawking's son. When that didnt fly he switched to Tony Romo's cousin
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
I don't know... But I do think this is probably the longest series of texts we've written discussing your cock. David was right, it is a brave new world. Also, slow day at work again?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
Gay?
German.
Pity.
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
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