went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
Just walked into the bathroom and looked straight ahead and made eye contact with a guy taking a shit through the crack in the stall door...
Just watched a guy get through airport security with a full bottle of captain morgan. In my head the entire airport cheered.
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
We tried to play tennis but after about 15 minutes we gave up and fucked against the fence. Woulda been a cute third date so of course I had to ruin it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
There's going to be a velveeta shortage. I'm not drunk any more, this is just dire info.
Ok: all ex-gfs except you from the last 5 years have or are about to have a baby...be on the lookout...
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
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