im in an endless cycle of being too hung over to eat all day...then getting too drunk because i didnt eat anything. where is my life going?
Everything about him screamed your future.
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
I think you'll appreciae more than anyone that I'm renting my parking spot out for a half gallon of vodka a month.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
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