so that wasnt chicken after all
Apparently I farted on her in my sleep. Then, just to be sure she was cool, I did it again on purpose and she didnt say anything. So, WIN?
Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
I'm passing your future prison.
you woke me up in the middle of the night to tell me you were taking off your pants and it was not an invitation.
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
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