Uhh me and Jacque peed on the street outside the bar last night and wiped with flowers. I vaguely remember her repeating the word "fresh" over and over.
MY DAD AND I ARE ON OUR WAY OUT OF FLORENCE AND I JUST SAW A MAN AT A BUS STOP WITH A GIMP HAND SLAP HIS DAUGHTER ACROSS THE FACE WITH IT.
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
Randomize
