What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me
areolas are like halos for boobs.
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
The number of injuries I get impersonating Shakira while drunk is getting ridiculous. Sprained vagina, dude.
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
My vagina feels like a chupacabra ripped me apart using its mythological set of needle pointed teeth
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
Randomize
