He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
woke up in nothing but a glued-on tiger tail. they used super glue.
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
i've created a new STD.
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
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