If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
I don't know who the girl crying at my kitchen table eating gravy from the KFC container is, but I feel like she could be my soulmate
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
Walking down the street at 11 pm dressed in bubble wrap. Why is the bar so fucking far away??
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
Randomize