you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
I hate fucking guys that don't drink coffee. My morning hangover and shame will not be cured by your stupid tea.
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ps if your frozen peas taste like crotch it's because some dude kicked me in the nuts while trying to do a keg stand and I needed an ice pack
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
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