Do you still have your period?
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
Randomize
