6:33 AM: I'm drunk at this time of morning.
Why on earth are you answering my texts promptly? Thought for certain you'd be caught up in some ridiculous orgy by this time.
I'm that good.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
If we ever start off with margaritas for breakfast and end up naked covered in olive oil...I could think of worse ways to spend a day.
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
THIS FUCKNUGGET
DOES HE EVEN REALIZE HOW MANY INCREDIBLE INSULTS I'VE WASTED ON HIM
I'VE INSULTED THE EVERLOVING SHIT OUT OF HIM AND HE CAN'T EVEN APPRECIATE IT
THE HO
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
The cop was standing next to me when I texted "haha" to your phone...didn't realize that he had taken it already...
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