let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
god damn woman. you are like the herpes of drunk texting. you never go away.
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
I've come to realize that after waking up this morning for work no one wins in bar dice.
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
If you want to borrow my flask for all future interviews as a good luck charm because your last one went so well with it in your suit pocket, just let me know
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
Randomize
