Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
You have to commit to sexting. You can't just quit right after I send you pictures of my asshole.
Seriously, come on.
I feel like there's a picture of my ass on the internet right now.
I hate you.
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Did you get good sleep?
I dreamt that I was a lipstick lesbian in the 1950s, working at Walgreens and solving mysteries.
So yes.
Randomize
