I made my friend ***** cry when I wouldn't let her call u for an orgy at 3am...I didn't think you'd be to happy being woke up
I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
He's trying to marry me, when is the appropriate time to tell him my real name and that Dallas is a completely fictitious slutty alter ego? I need the advice of someone with morals.
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
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