I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
Oh btw, my mom called... you made the police blotter in the newspaper. Don't worry, she's mailng me a copy so I can put in on the fridge.
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
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