Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
I just remember thinking, if she falls asleep, I'm totally eating that spilled chex mix right off of her.
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
Dislocated my knee during sex, popped it back in and kept going. Then got simpathy chipotle out of it too.
Finding an empty bathroom to shit on campus is like the quest for the fucking Holy Grail. Except with more stench and humiliation.
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
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