You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
Randomize