called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
Randomize
