Note to self: When getting ready to leave with a kid in a wheelchair don't say Let's roll
4 words: hood of his car
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.
He asked if he could come over tomorrow....
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
My dad made a joke about you sending me strippers for valentine's day so clearly everything here is normal
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
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