After he proceded to violently molest my tits until 9 am i snuck out of his room only to meet his mother downstairs, who informed me she heard the giant sexfest going on in the room next to them.. this was before she called us both "chickenshits".. worst walk of shame ever.
half the nation just spent an hour watching a balloon fly around. we are officially the dumbest fucking country.
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
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