I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
My fight-or-flight response is really more fight-or-fuck
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
You just sent a mass text asking if anyone ever drank the blood of a goat in the glorious name of Satan...after that we confiscated any writing utensil
Randomize
