porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
How am I still drunk? Whoever said breakfast is the most important meal obviously didn't skip dinner and go drinking.
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
Randomize
