For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
You took a bar mat shot.
If I pissed all over some chicks bed I would probably apologize for getting so wasted, not putting out, and turning into a god damn R. Kelly Cinderella... Not ask for coffee and a ride home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
You know you were way drunk when you wake up at 7 AM halfway on a couch, tangled in a sheet with your shoes still on.
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
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