This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
i feel like the song jizz in my pants was made for him.
her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
I just got to my parents hungover as hell. My dad could tell and said "theres only one cure for a hangover" and handed me a beer. This morning went from a 0 to 10 in an instant.
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
Randomize
