...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
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I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
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My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
I have never lost more friends than while playing Uno drunk.
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
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