You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
My neighbor caught me peeing on his rose bushes at 2 in the morning while wearing my Santa hat. My sex appeal has never been higher.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
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