At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
Classy. Drunk on alcoholic "energy drink" at work before 8 am on a Tuesday. Between that and hanging out in bars with no pants on, your life is beginning to sound like a Bukowski novel.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
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