i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
i awoke yet another morning with penis breath. ive been so generous santa has to bring me a shit ton of presents
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
I just realized I consumed seven different types of alcohol this weekend. And I'm only counting jungle juice as one of those. How the fuck did I not die?
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
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