the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
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