He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
I made him leave at 3am, he texted me a couple minutes later and said the elevator was broken and he was sleeping in there, but he said I was worth it so I don't feel guilty
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
Oh man
I hooked up with the lead singer of the band at the wedding. I am so hungover.
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
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