There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
Can we just cry and dive into a couch-sized bag of sadness-chips, dip them in a la-z-boy sized jar of depression salsa while watching a show called 'Forget Your Hopes and Dreams, Just Kill Yourself'?
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
I woke up with my phone plugged into an extension cord in my garage. No clue how I got home. Videos of me flogging my roommate with my set of keys telling him he's the worst roommate ever. And my mom woke me up at 8am asking how to make a DVD...Goddamnit first Friday.
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
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