I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
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