I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
I'm mopping my WALLS now. And talking to my mop. I literally just told it "yeah I kno that dirt doesn't wanna come off but were gonna get aren't we?" This is some good snow!!! mini maid needs to give it to their maids. The world would be spotless!!!!
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
Randomize
