OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
That falls under the "unwelcome penises" category. Also that's definitely a sentence I never thought I would say
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
i havent showered for 4 days and i just made my dog smell my arm pit. also, im stoned.
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