I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
Semen is not good for contacts.
Sorry for feeding you peanuts last night while you were sleeping, you looked hungry.
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
i woke up this morning with a fake eyeball in my pocket
Randomize
