ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
So I told him it takes a lot to get me drunk & he said he was the heavyweight champion in college. We high-fived. Obviously I'm the favorite child.
Learn from me. When going to a booty call do not wear a belly shirt. Nothing says shame like a belly shirt at 7am.
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
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