I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
Mike is offhisass drunk and just sat down next to my sister and said "If you gained 30 pounds and stopped reading poetry, I would be attracted to you. Now, your little sister, attractive, even though she's basically the same person as you- she just pulls it off better because she's 15."
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
Dude I was taking a shower and I kept looking down at the drain expecting Mario to come up, yell "It's a me, Mario!", tickle my balls, and go back down the drain.
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Randomize
