I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
I woke up this morning wearing my tux shirt and jacket, but no pants.
______ was pissed. My breath tastes like tequila and doritos, and I couldn't get it up.
I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
It is officially Christmas time in Chicago. There's a drunk hobo on the CTA singing the first 2 lines of Frosty the Snowman over and over and over.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
Randomize