Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
I just saw a woman parallel park a horse. Awesome. Only in New York..
I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
Just realized our kids will one day call us old because we were around when texting came about. I'm sad.
23 Strangest Things That Gave Dudes A Boner
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
Pretty sure the purpose of joining wine clubs isn't to drink the 2 bottles they send you each month IN THE SAME NIGHT.
These 21 People Shouldn’t Be Giving Dating Advice
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
He reached a whole new level of creepy. We were getting a coffee and he noticed the girl at Starbucks name tag looked her up on fb and friend requested her right there without ever introducing himself
I'm either a high functioning alcoholic or I'm making the most of the fact that this is the last year that its socially acceptable to be black-out drunk five days a week.
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not