Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
When you're opening a bottle of tequila with a golf club, it's probably time to stop drinking...
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
You need a sexual gate keeper
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
Hey douche face I just want you to know, if you ever got hit by a bus, I'd really miss you.
Only if you died obviously.
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
Ryan. I woke up. At the neighbors house. And by the neighbors. I mean the ones to the north. The ones that hate us. Please call me. I am so confused and you are gone
At the neighbors house?! Like in it or outside???
In it on the fucking couch. No idea how i got here.
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
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