There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
I feel like I just did it with Buster from Arrested Development. Taking a shower. #winefail
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
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